This is a guest post from Allan Douglas. I really appreciate these guest posts during my time of life flux.
There is a tendency for authors, especially new authors, to discount the value of the established and venerated publishing houses; those establishments that have for, in some cases, hundreds of years provided the readers of the world, with quality materials to entertain, inform and enlighten. But suddenly the reverent awe in which we have always held these firms is being besmirched, like graffiti on a church by a pair of hooligans; a bratty upstart called Self Publishing and his sidekick Indie Press. Oh, sure, their cousin Vanity Press has been prostituting herself for almost as long as the Big Houses have been around, but she pretty much kept to herself and offered little threat to them.
Self and Indie, however, have managed to lure a sizable contingent of writers into their posse with promises of instant money and fast stardom. But, here are six reasons why authors should stick with the brick and mortar giants of publishing.
One
Rejection is so rewarding. You enjoy spending a year or more querying agents and wallpapering your office with the politely worded notices that you aren’t quite right for them at this time, serving as an everlasting memorial to your inadequacy.
Two
You enjoy the challenge of rewriting your book to conform to the socio-political stance of the publishing house that has seen promise in your work.
Three
You want to savor the prolonged anticipation and expectation of knowing your book is in the works and will be made available to the general public by stretching it out for a year or a year and half if possible.
Four
An up-front cash payment of several thousand dollars is enough of a carrot to induce you to give up all rights to your work, trusting that the Big House will be actively seeking every possible opportunity to sell said work.
Five
Because, should said work sell well enough to cover your advance and produce royalties, 5% to 7% of sales is certainly generous compensation for the paltry amount of labor and thought you put into the creation of one book. After all – how much sweat and angst can it take to produce a book that sells well?
Six
Self publishing, like micro computers and cell phones, is a fad; merely a passing fancy with technology. Once the hoopla wears off, all reputable authors will be pounding on the doors to the hallowed halls of the Big 6 begging forgiveness for their sinful dalliance with this slick-talking upstart.
So, what’s it going to be? I say; hold tight to your Smith Corona typewriter and that curly-corded telephone and keep banging out query letters to feed your rejection addiction. After all; we ARE supposed to suffer for our art, aren’t we?
_____________________________________________________________________
The egocentric liar who cowers behind the pen name Allan Douglas has been an author, writer, prattler, dreamer since the 1970’s, published mostly in magazines but has duped publishers into producing three books to date, one through a publishing house the others self-published – but they were just an experiment; like that first cigarette out behind the barn, just to see what all the fuss is about. Really!
He lives on a mountainside in the Cherokee National Forest in East Tennessee with an undeservedly wonderful wife, a genius border collie and a Prima donna English hound who is queen of the mountain. He serves as an ordained Elder in his church, is a master woodworker, former custom furniture maker and once dreamt of sailing the world in a Bristol Channel Cutter. But then he met a girl, got all twitterpated and lost is way. Stories about his life as a mountain man wannabe are posted to www.SimpleLifePrattle.com. He also offers hackneyed advice to misguided writers at his blog http://AllanDouglas.com/blog/ where he compounds his offense by making a feeble attempt to sell the progeny of his tryst with a couple of the members of Self Publishing’s posse. May he never live down the shame!
Allan Douglas Writes
Bsn Web: www.AllanDouglas.com
Bsn Blog: www.AllanDouglas.com/blog/
Psn Blog: www.SimpleLifePrattle.com
From Joanna: Top image is my own from Sydney Writer’s Festival. The Green Room is reserved for authors who are speaking – I would say 100% of those are traditionally published at the moment – will that be changing?
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Excellent post. I came to this wondering what Allan could possiblty have to say and I was amused. It’s my kind of humour. Thanks for brightening my day.
Thank you Christopher, I’m glad you liked it.
hi Allan-
Now I am smiling ))
& these points could easily apply to the art gallery system as well.
time Now for People to decide. Not one person. Enough of the tyranny and lame “rejection” letters>>> (write something- even if it is mass produced – that is worthy, esp. a rejection notification)
Art for All ❤
Thanks for joining in Kara. Glad it made you smile. The new direction things are taking definately puts the decision of what is going to be popular (and thus sell well) into the hands of the buying public.
Wham bam thank you, maam, my questions are awnesred!
Haha. Loved this.
I’m glad, Lois. Thanks for saying so!
Brilliant…simply BRILLIANT!!!!
Awww… shucks… thankee!
Timely and very funny! Thanks for a great post Allan and Joanna!
Thank you for saying so Marcia!
I couldn’t help laughing… A great start to the day (the first post I read today). Thanks Allen
Glad to hear you’re enjoying yourself Joanna. I hope to hear more of UK from you Joanna. I visited a few years back and fell in love with the countryside and history!
Thanks Freay! I’m happy it helped to get your day off to a good start.
I think there are reasons to publish indie and reasons to go with traditional publishers, and each writer should research and review the options before deciding which works for him or her. Traditional publishers have a lot to offer in terms of editing (which many authors actually appreciate), marketing, and distribution, while indie publishers are preferable for those who want more control over rights and editing, or whose work is less mainstream, such as Abigail Hilton’s “Guild of the Cowry Catchers”.
I don’t think it’s a question of which one is better in general, but which one works better for the specific author or book.
This particular article presents an argument against traditional publishing, rather than for indie publishing. I have to admit, I’m a little shocked to see something with this tone posted on a blog that is usually more balanced.
Hi Lauren.
sorry the post shocked you – and yes, I am a fan of all kinds of adventures in publishing – but when I have a guest post, I let the author speak
This was aimed at being funny on Allan’s part – apologies if any offense caused. Not all humour translates on a blog.
Hi Joanna,
And no offense taken; just a bit of a raised eyebrow and a ping on my moderation-meter.
I knew it was meant to be funny, so correct me if I’m wrong in my “those who want to publish traditional are idiots, so let’s have a laugh at their expense” interpretation. Had it been “those who don’t consider any form of publishing except traditional are cavemen, so let’s have a laugh at their expense”, I might have laughed.
That said, best of luck with the book and promotion. Been seeing you all over the blogs in my Google Reader.
Take care,
~L
This was hysterical, Allan! I’ve got put a copy on the bulletin board over my desk.
Ahhhhh… I’ve broken into print publication!
Thanks, Susan.
How Dare you besmirch the good name of the ancient and revered publishing houses! How dare you imply that self-publishing and Indie are actually possible methods for creating and promoting literature.
How dare you break the old mold and spill the sand!
Would you do it again, please, on my blog?
Outstanding post, right up my alley! I’d forgotten how sarcasm makes points so very directly while being indirect!
Yes, I am so ashamed… I’ll eat not one but two pieces of chocolate as penance.
I suppose I should point out to those who missed the point, not you; you obviously got it, that my intent here was not so much to bloody the nose of traditional publishing, but to point out (mostly to newbie authors) that there are alternatives worth looking at. Authors who are comfortably ensconced in a lucrative contract with a legacy house should stay where they are comfortable. Those trying to batter their way through the door of those great bastions, may want to look at alternatives. We still need editors, but editors can be hired (or bartered).
Thanks for you engaging reply, Dave!
Thanks, Allan, for a wonderful bit of humour to add to my Sunday Self-Publishing Round-up. So good I read it twice.
Thanks Steven. I just got my notice of your newsletter in the e-mail. I am pleased and honored to be included.
Yeah, I’m all for banging my head against the wall Allan, who knows, it may knock some sense into me
Goodness knows someone’s got to do it!
Good to see you here Sire. thanks for commenting.
No sweat Allan, I tend to follow those that I admire.
Very clever! Thanks for the laugh (and the tweak of the nose to traditional publishing). I’m having a blast self-publishing my Spoofbook series, and the fact that I don’t have to wait literally years for some snotty publishing house to deign to answer my queries…well, that’s just icing on the cake.
Thank you Leah! I’m partial to butter-creme frosting myself, what is your favorite?
An absolute delight Allan!
So why is it that I still hold as one of my biggest goals to get published traditionally. Ah, those hallowed halls with their bruises to the ego continue to beckon.
A great contract with a major publisher is still the gold medal of the writer’s Olympics, Tanja, and I would LOVE to get one of my Sci-Fi books published by Del Rey or Tor BUT while we’re waiting for the great doors to the hallowed halls to swing wide and admit our pumpkin coach drawn by four white steeds, let’s look at what else is available. Hold to the dream, but don’t let life pass you by in the mean time.
Hilarious. Maybe if agents and editors would like to stay in business, they need to have a bit of a rethink. I doubt they’re up to it.
Love this! And don’t forget this one:
Give up creative control. You’ve got enough to do anyway. Who cares what the cover looks like or if they take a hack saw to your title? You’ll be too busy waiting for the first installment (1 of 3) of your paltry book advance to arrive.
Go self-publishing!
This is brilliant, and I speak as one who’s recently had a picture book text contracted and paid for by a (nameless) well-known publisher. It’s taken almost three years for them to decide they really want to do it, and I’ve been editing bits of it (at their request) for the past few months – this is a text of less than 1000 words! They’re now proposing to take it to Bologna in the spring, but once again they’ve gone silent re- final tiny edits and selection of an illustrator. When publishers are good, they are very, very good (eg Walker Books), but when they are bad, they are horrid. Check my opinions about epublishing on http://www. authorselectric.blogspot.com
Thanks Enid, it does seem like you have to get the right publisher as an author – the best fit is great but a bad fit is why so many are joining Team Indie!
Well said. I might add one more reason to stay with the big six. You LOVE to write a synopsis.
Go Team Indie
Catherine Bybee
New York Times Bestselling Author of Indie Published Romance
Wife by Wednesday
I loved it. I do think there is a place for Traditional Legacy Publishing. For those that have a need to see their books on a shelf–it really is the only way to get on them.
Still, I enjoy those monthly deposits in my bank account, thank you very much. I’ll stick with my indie publishing any day.
To each his/her own, I say. I won’t knock someone for going legacy–after all, some of them make millions. The publisher is behind them 1000%. But most authors aren’t going to make that kind of money–and why would they want to wait 2-3 years to find an agent, a publisher, and ultimately, their work in a store?
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